In the book of Jonah, the narrator tells the story of a man named Jonah, who is mentioned only one other time in the bible in a way that is not really congruent with how we see his character in the book bearing his name. In the book of Jonah, Jonah is simultaneously the worst prophet ever and the best prophet ever. When Jonah is given a task by Yahweh, he blatantly disregards his god’s instructions to go east to Nineveh and instead tries to go as far west as possible and run away from him. The boat he takes turns out to be filled with non-yahwists, but he does not make any attempt to convert them. When Yahweh attacks the boat with wind, trying to kill everyone for Jonah’s disobedience, the boat “thinks about” breaking apart in a weird display of animacy very uncommon in prophetic texts of the era. All of the men on the ship pray to their gods, but Jonah decides to ignore the situation and take a nap in the bottom of the boat (from which he is awoken immediately by the captain). When it is revealed by complete random chance (casting lots) that his god is responsible, they question him on where he is from, what god he likes, and what his occupation is. He conveniently neglects to answer the latter question, as if he is almost embarrassed to reveal himself as a prophet. Jonah uses a specific phrasing in his answer, saying that he “fears” Yahweh.
The text then goes on to say that the sailors became even more afraid, because Jonah had previously mentioned that he was running from Yahweh. This makes it even more confusing why casting lots was necessary to find out who’s god it was. Jonah, now admitting fault, does not attempt repentance, but rather tells the sailors to just kill him by throwing him into the sea. The sailors refuse initially to throw him overboard, and instantly convert to Yahwism in an attempt to save themselves without bloodshed. But this isn’t enough, and eventually they very repentantly throw him into the water. The men then “fear a great fear" of Yahweh and make sacrifices and vows to him. Now drowning in the rough water, Jonah is quickly eaten by a “big fish”. While sitting in the belly of the (initally) male fish for three days, he tells Yahweh he is glad he was saved and that he will be a very good boy from now on (notably, he doesn’t really apologize). Jonah is spit back onto dry land, and the fish is referred to as female (possibly as a childbirth joke). Yahweh gives Jonah the same instructions again, and this time Jonah actually goes to Nineveh. Nineveh is described as taking 3 days to cross, which would be a city larger than modern London. He walks one day into the city and proclaims “in forty days Nineveh will be overturned” (a Genesis reference, perchance). Following this amazing sermon in which Yahweh isn’t even mentioned, the entire city converts, proclaims a fast, and all dressed in sackcloth. When the “king of Nineveh” (who also happens to be king of the entire Assyrian empire) hears about this, he changes into sackcloth and sits in ashes.
The king proclaims that nobody, not even the cattle, are allowed to eat or drink, and all must be dressed in sackcloth (yes, including the cows). The king also bizarrely adds on that everyone has to stop being evil and violent because “Who knows? Maybe then the god will turn and relent, and turn from his fierce anger, and we won’t die.” It is possible that Jonah never even tells them the name Yahweh, because the Nenevites all just use “the god” to refer to him (as in, “that god who Jonah threatened us with”). After this miraculous conversion of the biggest city ever (at that point), Yahweh decides he will spare them. Jonah is angry about this, and complains about how Yahweh is always so compassionate to evil people who don’t deserve it. Jonah says he knew Yahweh would spare them anyway and didn’t want to waste his effort on the Ninevites. Out of nowhere, Jonah asks Yahweh if he would just kill him. This is the second (and not the final time) he asks somebody to kill him. Yahweh asks Jonah to examine whether he has any right to be angry. Jonah leaves Nineveh and sets up a little camp to watch what happens to the city. While he’s sitting there, Yahweh makes a leafy vine that shields him from the sun, and Jonah is pleased. The next day, Yahweh changes his mind and makes a crimson worm kill the plant. Yahweh makes a hot wind and makes it hotter, to make Jonah suffer. Jonah again asks if Yahweh would please just kill him. Yahweh teases, asking if Jonah’s anger about the plant is justified. Jonah says he is “angry enough to die,” which is the final time Jonah begs for death in the book. Yahweh says “You cared about the plant, which you didn’t even do any work for. It grew in a night, and died in a night. So should I not care about Nineveh, with more than 120,000 people who can’t tell their left from right, and many cows?” And on that magnificent line (about cows again), the story ends. No repentant Jonah, or divine consequences.
These strange details come together to paint a larger picture of this story. Not one of divine importance, but instead a story about a really really bad prophet who by pure luck (illustrated explicitly by the casting of lots) converts multiple groups of people despite very obviously not wanting to. Jonah does everything in his power to sabotage the operation, from running away to killing himself to delivering a sermon of only 6 words which contained no information but a vague threat. This, I believe, is meant to contrast directly with other biblical stories about cities not believing their prophets despite evidence, and failing. The story of Jonah is a comedy in the same vein as Don Quixote, which satirizes the biblical prophets, commenting on the fact they have so little success despite great odds, by having a terrible prophet have great success despite his own disdain for Yahweh. Interpreting Jonah as a parody opens wide the moral dimension of the text, which can now be seen as a critique of other biblical tall tales in its use of intentionally grandiose sections, funny hyperbolic language, and the inclusion of running gags such as describing everything as going up and down (Jonah is told to “get up” and go to Nineveh, but he “goes down” to catch a boat, etc), the same word meaning “evil” being used for both the actions of Jonah and the actions of Yahweh, and of course the repeated appearance of cows (in funny outfits).
Jonah — Biblical Hebrew for Linguists. gloss.ibc.oarc.science/en/jonah.1.1.
“Jonah (NIV).” Bible Gateway, www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Jonah%201&version=NIV.
Halpern, Baruch, and Richard Elliott Friedman. “Composition and Paronomasia in the Book of Jonah.” Hebrew Annual Review, vol. 4, 1980, pp. 79–92. The Ohio State University Knowledge Bank, https://kb.osu.edu/server/api/core/bitstreams/be80891d-c45d-5606-a557-08f2a1683134/content.